Suckerpunch, moving ahead one way or another!

[lovethehub]

I guess I am the only one not in agreement on this. While I can understand that it is time for your wife to move on and get a place of her own, which will most likely be living with OM, I don't see kicking her out as a punishment for behavior.

I also think that you should be the bigger man. You are talking about being the man that you want to be, growing, dealing with anger, etc. The reality is, your wife is dating someone else and she is serious about him, or appears to be. You can take the stand, "not on my property" (yes, it is unbelievable she is this insensitive but do you expect anything else from her at this point?) or you can deal with it. If she is dating him, everyone knows, your daughter is around him, why does it matter where this happens?

You talk about not wanting to hurt your D any more. Well, guess what? Having this much animosity in your R with her mom does hurt her. At some point you are going to have to accept that there is an OM in her life whether you like it or not and you are going to have to decide what behavior you want your D to see when you deal with this.

What has always stuck with me was being in my best friends wedding and she did not invite her father because their had always been so much anger between her parents. What a sad choice to have to make because 2 adults couldn't handle an issue the right way. With my d and my ex, I have always chosen to do what is best for my D, not what makes me feel better. Does it affect your D if OM is on your property? No, but it does affect her that M and D cannot get along and can't even be in the same room together. How is this action going to affect that situation? It is going to make it even worse and be that much longer before your D can see healthy co-parenting.

I am not saying your W is right, and I cannot imagine doing this. I am just saying someone has to be the one who considers the long-term affects of your co-parenting R on your D. The sooner you accept OM and learn to get along with BOTH OF THEM, because yes, your D is watching, the better.