Well, the restless feeling ended up going down and sort of fighting with D this afternoon.

At this rate we are going to play H*// getting through a settlement and being any kind of friends afterwards.

I finally told him I had his condom wrapper here but he should get it next time he is over as he must have wanted to save it.

He kept asking what kind of sick joke is this, so going to go the denial route the whole distance looks like.

I am ready to place my shelties and take off but I have no idea where I would go.

There is no life and no future for me it feels like.

I really do think I wish I just wouldn't wake up and never have to deal with all of this mess.

Talking to friend that was really down this afternoon and I wasn't any help there either. I did try, but I guess I was enough off emotionally that I just couldn't pull it off today to be much help.

No Sunshine today only rain.

Pam

"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned
so as to have the life that is waiting for us"