Summary: - BD was 14 months ago - Separated just under a year ago (W renting house 5 minutes away) - 50-50 custody of kids - W said about 2 months ago she wants to proceed with divorce. About 1 month ago she said she hadn't started the paperwork yet but intended to. Just after that she was diagnosed with breast cancer and has since had surgery for it. Radiation treatments start next week. I haven't asked about D and she hasn't mentioned it, so I assume it's on hold while she deals with the cancer. - There is a much younger OM who is actively involved with W, they go out a lot with our kids and he's over at her house frequently. Based on some snooping it seems clear that W has a crush on him, but I don't know if it's a PA or EA or if it goes both ways or not.
Update: W turned 50 last week. As I mentioned in my last thread, some coworkers, MIL and OM organized a big party for her and I was not invited. It took place Friday. Before I knew about the party I had bought her some presents and asked her if she wanted to get together Saturday. She said Monday would be better. Her BFF drove in from out-of-state for the surprise party and stayed the weekend. Her BFF is a real saint, this woman has had heart problems for over a decade, yet she has stuck by her husband who has MS. He has degraded to the point that he can't even get on and off a toilet by himself. His W has to do everything for him, yet despite her own health issues she has never wavered regarding her M. I really have a lot of respect for her! Anyway, W and BFF had not seen each other for 7 years. They stayed up until 2:30 to 3:00 am Friday through Sunday catching up! W dropped S10 off Sunday and brought BFF with her which I thought was really nice of her because I haven't seen her in 7 years either.
Because W had been up all weekend I told her yesterday (Monday) that if she wanted to forego getting together I understood and that I could just drop the gifts off at her house. But she did want to get together still. So we all went to dinner and then back to my house so she could open the gifts. I told her beforehand that I figured she was "cake and ice creamed out" from the weekend and that I didn't get her a cake and she looked really relieved and gave me the thumb's up, LOL! Now most of you probably know that Sandi's rules say no gifts, but W did give me some very thoughtful gifts for my recent bday and it is her big 5-0, so I wanted to return the favor. One of the gifts was a photo arrangement of the kids from our vacation trip to Arkansas (that W wasn't on)- kayaking, hiking and zip-lining. The frame had spots for 8 photos. I put 7 photos in and in the 8th spot I did a watercolor card with "We (heart) You Mom!". The heart was a separate piece that I attached to the outside of the glass on a block to space it out a bit. Then I had the kids sign the bottom of the card and it went behind the glass. She seemed really touched by it.
I haven't hardly seen W the last few weeks, just a few minutes maybe 2 or 3 times? This was the longest we've been around each other in quite a while. She seemed really open towards me, I'm not sure how to describe it but I think she enjoyed the evening despite being really tired.
I had a really great weekend, the weather was awesome Saturday so I spent the day flying my R/C planes and helis, riding 3 of my 4 motorcycles and washing my Mustang and taking a ride in it with the top down. Also went and visited a lady friend of mine. Had to do yardwork Sunday but still managed to get in some more flights too.
Thankfully the mono is FINALLY tapering off. It's been 4 weeks and I really just started feeling better late last week. I've been back in the gym and am back to my normal number of sets although I'm still not back up to the weights I was doing pre-illness.
From my last thread:
Originally Posted By: littleGTO
Get well, AS!
Sorry about the bday party for your W- not getting invited, but it sounds like you've handled yourself very well, as usual these days!
Boy, your wife is going through a lot, I have to say...for most women turning that next decade is killer! I still can't admit to turning 4-0 outloud!
Thank you! I don't know what the deal is with 40, I remember turning 30 and it was no biggie but 40, that was hard to fess up to, LOL! Then 50 didn't seem like a big deal either. So maybe it's downhill from 40
