Living in the Now(or how Ruby got her groove back)

[RosaLinda]

Ruby "I have a kind of unshakeable feeling that this is the right thing. H is my person. I love him and am letting it go"

It's hard but necessary right? My H is my man too, and I love him so am setting him free. We don't have nearly as good a relationship as you two do, Ruby, but it hurts like hell. 

Ruby "Don't know about H's path, but if he is telling me he has to figure this one out and to be patient, then I will do as he asks

That is a huge amount of pain and stuff to deal with. Who am I to say how one deals? I can only choose to deal for me"

None of our sitches are exactly the same (I dare say none comes close to yours Ruby). And we can't know what anyone else is truly feeling or going thru, just the little bit he or she is able to reveal thru their words on this forum, but I think we can understand each other's motivations better than the rest of the world can. 

Most of us are here because we have chosen to stand for our marriages. While the concept is similar, that also looks a little different for each of us. 

Ruby you do what you need to, work it out the best you can. I have a lot of hope for your marriage. I think you do too. I think it is great that you have decided to be there for your H, while patiently giving him time and space to work it out. 

And whether it does work out or not, in the end you will be glad to know that you did your best for him. That you were there for him. And you'll be able to live with yourself because you didn't give up. I do so admire you!

Sorry H has changed his mind about moving a third time, NGF must have thawed a bit. Or pushed a bit. It's a good reminder to me, H's OW hurts me so much, I hate her and am so jealous of her. But probably, like NGF, she's jealous of me too. 

Labug "However, if you said "Dude, I'm working through some sh!t with my H right now, are you good with that?" and he responded with "Cool" that's great for both of you."

Of course she did. Maybe not those exact words, but Ruby is nothing if not honest and honorable. The nickname SE2 is to protect HER heart from getting too close, and you can see Labug, that it isn't working too well.