Still at Square One!!!

[chasingpavements]

HI DFE, I know what you mean by feeling like a doormat! I have that feeling all the time. I am constantly nice and pleasant to my H. His LL is Acts of Service so I often go out of my way to do nice things for him. And then he is still nitpicky and complaining to me all the time over small things here and there that I am doing wrong.

I think it's possible that your H has a lot on his mind right now. Perhaps he is, like my H, taking time to think things over and confused over what to do. I think my H is depressed and constantly worrying and thinking about things, and it leads to him being distant and making harsh comments here and there.

Was your H upset because you didn't tell your friends that you were separated? And then he feels uncomfortable? What does he want you to tell your friends? If that is the case, you could try having a talk with him later and validating his concerns. As in, who out of your friends should you tell these things to, and what should you tell them. Perhaps that would put his mind at ease.

By the sounds of it, for the most part your H is friendly and wanting to spend time with you and your family, which is a good thing. If it was over for him, I don't think he would be wanting to spend so much time with you.