isnit strange how the moment we truly detach and let go they start wanting to get closer! i would say continue doing what you are doing, get on with your life and be happy, let him figure out what he wants to do all by himself. what i found is that when it comes to the OW the more we express our hurt and disapporoval of that relationship the more appealing and people like getting that which others say is no good for them, especially if they are going through MLC.
i am in the exact same situation as you, only thing is we dont have kids wish i had company and little ones to keep my mind off things! my H left me after a 7 year relationship for the OW, its been almost 2 years and during this time they have been on and off cause she was also married with kids! over this time i tried my very best to be there for him, to make him see how much i love him and that she is just a gold digger who is using him but nothing i said or did yielded any results. so a couple of weeks ago i decided i have had enough! if he wants to be with her then he can but i wont be the ex wife who is desperately in love because i figured he enjoyed that because it boosted his ego. i disconnected, stopped calling, texting and emailing and i am sure he is wondering whats going on because this is sooo unlike me. been speaking to a DB coach and she adviced to do a 180 and if you know how i have been over the past months you will know this 180 is huge for me....to be honest i am mainly doing it to get my sanity and self respect back because i have really disrespected myself by chasing after him and trying to get the marriage to work and to be honest since i cut off i get times when its very hard and i get so tempted to call or text but i stop myself...i know for certain that the point will come when he will have to reach out to me for financial reasons, joint properties...etc and at that point i wont be as available as he expects me to be or as i have been so far! the other reason is i want to be completely unavailableso he gets to spend all his time with OW because i know he will realise what i have been saying all along! one sentence i got from DB book that i really liked said something in the lines of by continuing to reason and asking for more of what they dont want means they continue to focus on the struggle with you and continue to want to get away from you and into the OW arms because i bet when you nag or bother them she is in the background highlighting that to him and making him see how clingy and annoying you are so by getting on with your life and focusing on you you give him the chance to focus on the loss! on his life without you and at times it makes them change their minds all by themselves!
i decided not to continue making a fool out of myself, disrespecting myself because in comparison to the OW i am a much better person, i would never come btw a married couple and contribute to destroying a family no matter what! thats just selfish and heartless and you should be proud of yourself that you are not like her! it also takes alot of courage to continue wanting to fight for your family despite what he did and the OW and you have done all you could and now it is time you made yourself happy and live life to the fullest from what you have said it seems he is starting to realise your value so keep up with this
wish i had company and little ones to keep my mind off things! my H left me after a 7 year relationship for the OW, its been almost 2 years and during this time they have been on and off cause she was also married with kids! over this time i tried my very best to be there for him, to make him see how much i love him and that she is just a gold digger who is using him but nothing i said or did yielded any results. so a couple of weeks ago i decided i have had enough! if he wants to be with her then he can but i wont be the ex wife who is desperately in love because i figured he enjoyed that because it boosted his ego. i disconnected, stopped calling, texting and emailing and i am sure he is wondering whats going on because this is sooo unlike me. been speaking to a DB coach and she adviced to do a 180 and if you know how i have been over the past months you will know this 180 is huge for me....to be honest i am mainly doing it to get my sanity and self respect back because i have really disrespected myself by chasing after him and trying to get the marriage to work and to be honest since i cut off i get times when its very hard and i get so tempted to call or text but i stop myself...i know for certain that the point will come when he will have to reach out to me for financial reasons, joint properties...etc and at that point i wont be as available as he expects me to be or as i have been so far! the other reason is i want to be completely unavailableso he gets to spend all his time with OW because i know he will realise what i have been saying all along! one sentence i got from DB book that i really liked said something in the lines of by continuing to reason and asking for more of what they dont want means they continue to focus on the struggle with you and continue to want to get away from you and into the OW arms because i bet when you nag or bother them she is in the background highlighting that to him and making him see how clingy and annoying you are so by getting on with your life and focusing on you you give him the chance to focus on the loss! on his life without you and at times it makes them change their minds all by themselves! 
