Guess I belong here now...

[RosaLinda]

Brobafet "I know how you feel. The worst feeling is knowing that I did as much as I could and she still cheated on me, multiple times. I loved her, and I cherished her even when she treated me this way. I know not everything was perfect but I don't think anyone ever deserves to be cheated on.

I'm glad that I am taking the steps to better myself. Who knows maybe this was all just practice. We can find that other person who will love us just as much as we love them. Keep your head up Sweet. Praying for you!"

Hi Brobafet, nice to meet you. I looked over some of your threads, sorry you're going thru such a hard time with the D and being away from your kids so much. 

I read that your W has been cheating for well over 2 years, with a short reconciliation. Sorry, I know how much that hurts. But 2 years can be a drop in the bucket in MLC land. If your W is having a MLC, she still may escape out of that tunnel even if you do D. Don't give up - look how much stronger you are now. And as my old MC used to say, even if you don't reconcile, you'll be a great catch for your next relationship!

SweetRed "He did say he didn't want to rush into things, because who knows what could happen, that "maybe we'd get back together". I kind of snorted at that, because I honestly couldn't believe he said it. 

He kind of looked at me, and said, well, maybe you're not in the same place as me. I would so work on things, but I can't let him think I'm eager. 

I'm kind of nervous about that sitch, but he is only looking at 1 bedrooms, so he doesn't seem to be thinking about getting her and her family to move. 

We may never get back together, so I don't want to get my hopes up, but we actually had a pleasant day together. We were able to joke around and have a good time. He almost seemed like his old self. "

This is great news, SweetRed! You did great, except maybe that snort But I would have snorted too, followed by that leaping happy heart thing! H looking at ONE bedroom apartments when the OW (who wants to move in) has 2 kids sounds like a positive sign that THEIR R is going no where! Him saying "maybe you're not in the same place as me" was great too!  What did you say? Will you bring that up again somehow? 

SweetRed "Last night at church the message was about God making us change. The point was that it takes a wakeup call for us to know something is wrong and that desperation is necessary for us to do something about it."

That sounds like a great message. About 2 weeks after BD#1, I was sitting in the living room listening to my H play the piano and sort of telling God how bad and wrong H was acting, and asking God to change H and make him love me again. I swear I heard a voice clearly say out loud "Linda you cannot change someone else, you can only change yourself" and I was instantly filled with the most overwhelming love for my H. I guess I should not have told him because he thought I was crazy, or fell in love with him only because I was losing him. 

But it was true and I still feel that love almost 4 years later. i've always hoped to hear that voice again too, but never have.