Thanks so much for the replies. It helps to hear others in the same boat. I am trying to do the same thing by detaching from the sitch. Wow its amazing to hear someone say once a week is trouble, when for my W it has been 3 times + a week.
I too am worried about the driving. I think she is too, because she was in a really bad DUI accident a few years before I met her. She nearly killed her two best friends and I know she still feels bad about it. One of her friends says she still apologizes every time they talk.
When she comes home she doesn't seem drunk. I think she stays out later to melow out and sober up a bit before returning home. I worry about it, but I am glad she is coming home now and not crashing a different places.
I has been coming up in conversations a bit the last few days. She is the one to bring it up as I tend not to approach it. Of course she says "she doesn't have a problem" or "She's english and can drink a lot." "She's a social drinker and drinks slowly." I know she feels uncomfortable about it, because she hasn't ever seen me drunk. I maybe get that way once a year if that, and if I do drink I am really responsible about the driving aspect and I really don't like to be drunk.
She told me last night she likes the feeling because it takes her edge off. She told me I don't have an edge to deal with. Of course thats not true as I have an edge dealing with the sitch, but I look to other places to release the tension.
I did tell her last night that I would feel better if she felt the need to get drunk to have me along. (At least then I can keep her safe). I am taking this slow and not doing anything to confront her about it.
Thank you very much for the input and support. I do know this will come to a head at some point down the road, I just hope I can be there for her when it does. I also pray she come to me for help before she does hit rock bottom with this.
God Bless You,
Reuben
Cautiously hopeful and keeping the Momentum
