The Show Must Go On

[RosaLinda]

Hi my Bright! Just catching up on your sitch. I didn't realize that you and your H never lived apart for more than 2 or 3 weeks, and that he always came home every second weekend or so. This separation must be REALLY hard on you.

I'm not sure that he means to be rude or curt in his texts. Text messages are so short, maybe that's why he did not say "would you please" instead of just demanding and stopped writing your name? I don't think my H EVER wrote my name in a text, and usually writes "K" and rarely "T" which I assume means thank you. Maybe your H was just having a hard day. Like you are, every day is a hard day, due to him, but that's another story!

I agree with Wonka, J, rH and Portia that you would be better to keep your messages light and fun like you were, and not follow his lead and respond "dry and short." Have you ever considered writing something like "hope all is well with you" or something like that? Or do you think it would be too pursuing? I know it's hard to be polite and sweet to someone who is ripping your heart out, but you don't have to answer right away either. Give yourself time to get over his tone if it bothers you. I often write nasty emails to my H and especially nasty ones to RT, which I delete and never send! But it makes me feel a lot better and gets my hurt off my chest.

"My H is looking for someone who has the qualities that he likes in me, minus the qualities he doesn’t like. Like my negativity (I fixed that one already), jealousy and mistrust in his social activities, you know, with the female friends. He wants a fun bar buddy, like “one of the boys” (his words to this Mexican girl he tried to have a R with), but at the same time independent, responsible, trustworthy, supportive, feminine, not too fat, not nagging, not judgmental, not jealous, secure enough in her mind and body so she would be OK with his playboy magazine... At the same time she would accept him the way he is – drinking every day, hanging out at the bars with questionable crowd, rarely complimenting her, trying to do the single guy activities, requiring the toothpaste being squeezed out in certain way… Oh, just read all these and now thinking “Why do I want him?” crazy"

Well and what kind of success do you think he's going to find in THAT search? Don't worry my dear, when he wakes up from his MLC, he will realize all the great changes you have made in yourself, and that you really are the woman of his dreams. IF YOU decide that you still want him after all this time. It is entirely up to you! But I think you do, as you are still Standing here with the rest of us dopes!