No affairs in the past. Suprising I'm okay right now as I was expecting the worse. I am going to go home and act as if I don't know anything. When I am with my wife, I am going to be positive and act like I have my stuff together even though I don't. I need time to digest this and figure what my next course of action is. I spoke to a deacon friend of mine today and he was telling me that I should continue doing what I'm doing (follow the 37 rules), GAL, DB, etc and wait to see what happens on the next several months. This is going to be hard. DBing when there is not another OW or OM involved is nothing compared to having to deal with an affair (I've now been in both situations). I feel violated, raped and ashamed. I thought I was getting closing to reconiliation/piercing and now I know that I am far from it. I am still in denial I think. I know that if I confront her it will be over - so confrontation is a no go at this point. Maybe this is what I needed to find out in order to detach, get cold and hearten my hard while somehow trying to DB(what a paradox). I am more lost and confused...
