I wanted to come back to this board and post a few things I have learned on my journey over the past 8 or 9 months. I wish I was at a point to reply to a lot of these new threads I see on here, but I feel like I am still learning myself. But I did want to point out a few things that I have leaned. My latest thread is in the piecing forum if anyone wants to catch up. 1. Listen to the veterans on this board! I know it's hard when you feel like your world has been flipped upside down. Your natural instinct is to grab on to your spouse for dear life. Because that's where you have turned to in your worse moments for so very long. But the first thing they will tell you is to GAL! This is more important than anything else. Go do it. If you sit around and just think about your sitch you will drive yourself nuts and you will also drive your spouse nuts. Unfortunately they are the last person you can go to right now. 2. The sooner you take veterans advice the sooner you will feel better about you. DBing is about you!!! Not your spouse. Its about becoming the best you you can be. As a wise man told me. "This is all about becoming the best you and best father you can be with a CHANCE to save your marriage. If you don't save your marriage, you will save yourself" I have lived by that ever since! 3. Speaking of. Your life is not over. Most of us here were very dependent on our spouse. You have to be happy with you first plain and simple. You really can't make someone else happy until that happens. 4. Patience, patience, patience!!!! 99 percent of us didn't get into this overnight and it will not end overnight. This is what I have learn led the most. You can't fix this or you overnight!! You have to sink in for the long haul I really hope that everyone here finds what they are looking for. I have a chance to save my marriage. I'm not there yet. But everyday I ask myself, "will this get me closer to my goal or not"
