The nice gesture from the W was a bonus and perhaps she was just feeling nice altogether who knows. I was more glad to see you stand up for yourself and still took the kids out regardless if that annoyed your W.
You thanked her for lunch right? You can thank her just don't overdo it, dont kiss her a$$, just thank her like you would treat a co-worker that gave you nice gesture.
me40; W43 M18; T~20 D18; S13 & S3 bomb 5/9/11 EA busted 4/30/12; 9/4/12; 4/29/13; 6/10/13 same OM
Separated 4/1/14
"Even a flicker of light will shine through darkness-12/25/2012"....better days ahead.
Sure I did. And dinner as well. What's got into her? Never mind then.
M35 XW34 D5 D4 M 6years T 10years Bomb 5/2013 Joint Petition signed 6/2013 Moved out end of 8/2013 Court Hearing of Joint Petition 9/2013 D finalized in 3 months - no news yet
W got back home with her sister and friend. While I was bathing the girls, OM came over. He's helping W and her sister with something. Looks like another talk with W is in session.
M35 XW34 D5 D4 M 6years T 10years Bomb 5/2013 Joint Petition signed 6/2013 Moved out end of 8/2013 Court Hearing of Joint Petition 9/2013 D finalized in 3 months - no news yet
They left really late into the night. I wanted to speak to OM personally but couldn't lest I make a scene and that's going to be embarrassing to all. I reaffirm my boundary to W while looking straight into her eyes later. This is the third time. She didn't like it. She shot that I should not behave that I have any sort of authority. I have my boundaries I told her. Being firm twice in 1 day is interpreted as being controlling to her.
Don't know what tomorrow brings. Lets just hope a little less 'rain'.
M35 XW34 D5 D4 M 6years T 10years Bomb 5/2013 Joint Petition signed 6/2013 Moved out end of 8/2013 Court Hearing of Joint Petition 9/2013 D finalized in 3 months - no news yet
W got back home with her sister and friend. While I was bathing the girls, OM came over. He's helping W and her sister with something. Looks like another talk with W is in session.
Did you tell OM he wasn't allowed to be in your house?
(I'm on moderation still, so I'll ask my next question):
If "yes", you did tell him that he was not allowed at your house, then why did he spend the evening at your house? You set a boundary and didn't enforce it.
-PM
M:12y - BD:12/11 - D:6/13 - 4Ds
"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy." -MLK Jr.
D3 woke up in the middle of the night again. W got upset. I got up to comfort D3. I'm almost always the one who comforts D3. W cried. I tried to comfort her but she pushed me away. Tantrum throwing again. She's under a lot of pressure and she don't handle them well.
I know I should detach from all of this.
M35 XW34 D5 D4 M 6years T 10years Bomb 5/2013 Joint Petition signed 6/2013 Moved out end of 8/2013 Court Hearing of Joint Petition 9/2013 D finalized in 3 months - no news yet
What are her consequences if she disrespects your boundaries?
I don't know what I can do at the moment. I signed away the house to W. She has my children's custodianship. It's a miracle she haven't kick me out yet. She told me that its not her fault that OM is pursuing. She don't seem to have any sort of remorse or guilt. She doesn't think its an EA. EA is a new term even to myself and I don't even know how to translate it. All I ever said was to put herself in my shoes which doesn't work at all. What can I do? I just feel to packup and leave. What about my children then?
M35 XW34 D5 D4 M 6years T 10years Bomb 5/2013 Joint Petition signed 6/2013 Moved out end of 8/2013 Court Hearing of Joint Petition 9/2013 D finalized in 3 months - no news yet
What do you mean you "signed away the house"? Does that mean that you completely gave it to her? And in terms of your children's custodianship, does that mean that you "legally" gave her total custody of them?
"W got upset."
About what? That your D cried or that she couldn't sleep? Selfish either way.
"W cried."
Why?
"I tried to comfort her but she pushed me away."
Comfort her for what?
"She's under a lot of pressure and she don't handle them well."
Who cares? You can't keep babying her.
An EA can be translated as having a strong crush on someone who is not your spouse.
Is there any way you can get 50% custody of your kids?
M-43 W-40 2D - 9 and 5
Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet a new life.
I gave away part ownership of our house to W as per D agreement with nothing in return. It's hers now. In my country, only one parent is awarded full custody and usually it's the mother. Spoken to 2 different solicitors.
I think she couldn't comfort D3 successfully that made her upset. I waited until she absolutely couldn't handle D3 before taking over. W cried thereafter and went to the bathroom. I went in to check on her because she's fist hitting the wall in the middle of the night. I tried to comfort her and she did push me away. She mentioned something about 'everybody just wants me to die'. That's frustration talk. D3 cried again and I went back to calm her. Check on W moments later, she was sitting facing a mirror and later had a long bath. Weird me out. Never seen her like this.
Comforting others is one of the 180s I'm looking to build on.
She has disrespected my boundaries. I don't even know what consequences she will have to face from me. I have no leverage.
M35 XW34 D5 D4 M 6years T 10years Bomb 5/2013 Joint Petition signed 6/2013 Moved out end of 8/2013 Court Hearing of Joint Petition 9/2013 D finalized in 3 months - no news yet
