GALing...what kinds of things have interested you but you never had time to try or was there a hobby you used to love that you miss? I love the various daily GALing activities and those are important; for me the ones that helped me really start moving forward and accepting my new life were the ones that my heart was really into.
If you could incorporate something your heart is really into with meeting new people...now you're on to something.
Personality is who the world sees, character is who you are
I know what you mean about the cycling emotions, even daily cycling! I try not to dwell on the anger, because that's one of the biggest changes I need to make for myself, and because I really do understand why my W got involved in an A. I was so tied up in work and health and other personal problems that whe was absolutely starving for affection.
But, that doesn't stop it from coming up, along with the hurt and sadness.
Good morning all, Yes, it seems I am going thru a daily cycling of emotions at this point. I am so very tired of this too. 3 months into this and I am trying hard to get a grip. I realize that as time passes things will get easier. I know also I have got to quit wondering what might be next with my WAW but that is easier said than done. One minute I feel it would be best she just file for D and the next minute i'm hoping for something positive from her. Alright, I'm going to look for a GAL activity for the day.
My GAL today was walking to the store for cat food and doing the dishes and cleaning the sink! LOL. Oh, and then I did some exercises at home. This was pretty big for me because I did it all before work. Still trying to get on a normal schedule, but managed to sleep most of the night through and then start early (I HATE mornings!).
Anyway, I only elaborate because sometimes GAL can be a pretty small thing. I'm not a big fan of cleaning, but it actually made me feel better. Even though I had to really force myself to start.
A saying I picked up from a monk (no kidding) that I saw on TV once, who suffered from a horrific physical injury and then major depression was what helped him every day was "to get your feet on the floor and get moving!" Might be easier for a monk, I don't know. I kind of feel like a monk these days, though, that's for sure. :-/
hi 2old, hope you find an activity to do today. You are sounding a lot more positive lately, keep up the good work milehigh, love the nick, lol. I agree with what you are saying. It's hard to get moving when you're depressed. sometimes things overwhelm me and I can't be bothered doing anything. It helps having a son to look after as you've got to keep yourself motivated. My son has special needs and he can be very demanding at times. He has high functioning autism and one of his "things" is routine. He like to know what we're doing every day. Once he knows this then it will extend to the next day, then the next, then the next, lol. It's stresses me out at times! lol Which is why I'm having a very large wine at the mo I can't seem to have a quiet life! Tomorrow though I've cancelled everything so I can do my weekly shop and catch up with friends I've still got some paperwork to sort out which may or may not get sorted out tomorrow. Yes it is officially my day off! lol. I've been at my son's youth club today helping out, we walked around town afterwards and we were back at the youth club in the evening. I've been out of the house today for about 13 hours! I think I deserve a day off tomorrow Anyway, I'm prattling on, lol. Have a great day
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Today doesn't bring a GAL activity as yet. Instead of emailing my W I am writing here to rid myself of the urge to contact her. So, I can see how I am cycling thru all this. Funny how I'm so much more aware of it three months into this. I've gone from anger to now feeling down. Probably part of this is my son in law married to my W's D is wanting me to come visit them for a few days next week. It is their 12th anniversary 4 days before ours. He says he would like to surprise the kids as they keep asking about why grandma and grandpa are living in different places. They are 13(boy) and 8 (girl)years old and the oldest contacts me alot via text, FB or by phone of late. They all say they miss me and I believe them. My w and moved there a couple of years ago to be closer to them so alot of family time was spent together. Oh well, what next....
Just to add I have been reading others sitch and a couple of them reflect how I am feeling at the moment. After 3 months my WAW and I still haven't had the talk. Basically she just left. This right now is maddening. But, i guess I would only hear what I really dont want to hear. so, I guess I have no alternative but to leave things the way they are. With only sporadic emails and no phone contact at all. Again, I am journaling here so as to not email my WAW.
Well done for not emailing your W Like I've said before, my H didn't tell me the reason he moved out either. You just have to let it go, you'll find out sooner or later It does sound like your W has MLC/depression and this is hard to figure how they are thinking. Basically their mind is in a fog and they can't think straight. I wonder also whether your W is going through the menopause. This can start odd behaviour as well. Try not to think about the whys and wherefores. Focus on you
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
Hello Trying, yes I am focusing on me....And I am using this site at the time for writing to keep me from doing something really stupid like contacting her. I find this really helps. The urge to email her has subsided this morning and all is better. One thing, she really has no idea what I am up to as I have not said much to either her or her D. Nor have I written any stupid emails or responses to hers. Ha, therefore I am using this forum to release my feelings which I'm told is okay. I have been seeking out Sandi's responses to different threads because of her first hand knowledge of WAW. She really knows the mind of most all WAS's and LBS's. As far as my W, it's not menopause she went thru that long time back. But you and a few others are probably right MLC or some depression. I know it's not easy for me to foresee what she is thinking but her emails do reflect a fog at times in my opinion. But, then again I am only guessing.
I just had an idea that I've just told someone else about. Have you thought about doing a part time course at your local college? See if you can get a brochure or look it up on the internet and see if you can find something that you've always wanted to do such as learning French, cooking, art, etc. You can meet new friends as well on the courses
H47 me48 T22 M21 S20 - Got high functioning autism 3/2000 H admits to OW and moves out to live with her 11/2000 H moves back home 2/4/13 H moves out H tells me he wants D 6/13, but now he can't afford to!
milehigh, love the nick, lol. I agree with what you are saying. It's hard to get moving when you're depressed. sometimes things overwhelm me and I can't be bothered doing anything. It helps having a son to look after as you've got to keep yourself motivated. My son has special needs and he can be very demanding at times. He has high functioning autism and one of his "things" is routine. He like to know what we're doing every day. Once he knows this then it will extend to the next day, then the next, then the next, lol. It's stresses me out at times! lol