Husband Threatened to Leave, Don't know what to do

[Lll54]

Well....it happened. Our first R talk since bomb #2. He brought it up so I went with it. He explained to me that he appreciates my efforts, and that he doesn't want me to think it is going unnoticed. He has seen a drastic positive change in me and loves it. BUT....he is very skeptical it's lifelong. He has asked me many times for this change and I have never followed through in the past. And he is somewhat pessimistic about it all. I don't blame him. He stated that even though we have had a really good two or three weeks he isn't 1000% sure we are good an back an our marriage is on track. He said leaving isn't in his mind anymore but at the same time he isn't going to rule it out because he just doesn't see me sticking to my changes due to my past track record. He is a policeman and therefore he finds it hard to trust me with this and have faith in me. He explained he is lied to everyday and so it's hard to separate his way of thinking on the streets and his way of thinking with me. He just told me its gonna take time for him to fully believe my changes are lifelong and i just told him that's all I need. I can talk his ear off telling him it is but actions speak louder than words. He said he isn't going anywhere but to expect that he will have good days and be happy with me but those bad days and skeptical days are gonna creep up and he won't mean to me mean or angry with me but it is going to be his skepticism peeking through and coming out. Wasn't sure what to say to get him to believe I've made the changes and are sticking to it so I didn't say much.

The one scary thing he did say was that he isn't sleeping well at all. And the last time that happened was right before he left last time. And he doesn't know why he can't sleep. He said leaving isn't in his mind right now so he isn't sure why. And it scares me to death....