DD it is sometimes difficult to understand why they choose the other person. my H has had numerous affairs with our clients. at first I thought - well, I am just a SAHM who helps with our business, I dress nicely but it is comfortable/casual, no high heels or makeup; and these are "career women" who spend a lot of time every day on their appearance. and then I found out who some of the OW were - I was shocked! most were not attractive, some were overweight and just dumpy looking! what did he see in them?
but you never know. maybe she is attracted to this OM because he is different, sort of like an "adventure". maybe she just started talking to him at work and he confided all about his life, and the affair developed from there. you might want to read the book "Not Just Friends" by Dr Shirley Glass, it gives an insight into workplace affairs.
in the meantime, keep up what you're doing. your relationship with your kids (doing fun things together) is important regardless of the affair. (you know the song "Cat's in the Cradle"? you don't want to be like that! ) and even though your wife is not paying attention to the kids as she should, she will see what a fun time you and they are having together and at some point she will want to be part of it! and it is extremely attractive to a woman when she sees her children's father giving them attention. but, that shouldn't be your reason; the kids themselves are the reason. your wife's reaction to it is just a fringe benefit.
) and even though your wife is not paying attention to the kids as she should, she will see what a fun time you and they are having together and at some point she will want to be part of it! and it is extremely attractive to a woman when she sees her children's father giving them attention. but, that shouldn't be your reason; the kids themselves are the reason. your wife's reaction to it is just a fringe benefit.