Newcomer's brief summary

[doubledown]

Thanks for you reply AnotherStander! My DB coach and I discussed whether I should disclose my knowledge of the A and we agreed it's probably best for now not to say anything and focus on DB techniques. But, I wanted to get some perspective from others who have gone through this as well. I can understand the "cake eating" idea, but she tells the OM how she can't stand it (living with me). Is the "cake eating" concept that she is able to maintain a place to stay, see our kids daily, have the expenses covered, etc., but still able to go out and spend time with OM? Because she sure spends most of her day gone. Comes home around 9:00pm and in bed by 11:00. I've really been working hard at being in a good mood, not asking alot of questions about where she's been or what kept her so late at work. I'm trying to give her space, but I just saw an email that said she can't stand it at home because I'm always around and she can't even get a minute to send the OM an email. I guess that means I need to give her even more space! I don't think I'm ready to divulge my knowledge of the A. I'd hate for her reaction to be radical and move out quickly. I just don't feel confident dictating what the boudaries should be right now. I'm the odd man out. She's the one who is making choices that could cause everyone invloved alot of damage.