Consult a lawyer. Rights vary from state-to-state and country-to-country, in some locales once you leave you cannot go back unless the spouse gives permission. In others you can go back whenever you choose.
You mention your H wants to settle things "his" way which is one more reason you should consult a lawyer, to make sure your rights are protected.
Consulting a lawyer for advice doesn't mean you're pushing for divorce or anything, it's just a way of finding out what your rights are. Good luck.
