Lost, confused and trying to make a stand

[brobafet]

Wendy,

I will try it thank you.

Major breakthrough for me however. My attitude toward all of this is starting to balance itself out. I have my moments of sadness and pain, but I can stop them in their tracks now. Anger comes but it is gone in seconds, I don't and didn't have much to begin with.

I'm drawing more, which is my zen area. I love it and I am getting better, I just need to get my 3d programs back on my computer and I'll be right as rain, that and I need to stop smoking, it is a pain.

Noticing that stbxw has a bit of a chip on her shoulder, her attitude when I pick up my kiddos is cold, though I don't say much, or engage her when i'm there. I just tell her that I'll have the kids back on sunday, doesn't seem as happy as she was a few weeks ago. Could just be me, but she seems to be stuck, she hasn't found a job yet and she is in her mom's house still. I'll be moving at the end of this month, even though springs is a dump and I hate it, I'll have my job in denver and will look forward to the drive each day. My imagination can go rampant and I can come up with some illustrations (I'm hoping to become a full time illustrator).

I've cleaned up my FB page. All pictures of her are gone I may need to look through again, going to be taking down all pictures of her around the house, which doubles as packing to move. I've changed my status from M to Single. Some have said that was a big step, I don't know if it is but I'm accepting the fact that my M is over. I can move on and face each day with a positive attitude. I know I can do this, I can be better and I can move on from someone who was abusive to me. I can only control me and its a good feeling that I no longer come into my house wondering who she is or was talking to. That feeling in the pit of my stomach is becoming smaller, it is slow but I have also accepted that. I like the feeling of making it smaller and smaller.

Thanks for the words and the support.