Wow Cadet, There is alot in what you posted for me. Yes, 1 year and 10 months ago her Mom passed. They were not close as my W always said she was really mean to her growing up. Even so we always visited her and they got along okay. Her Dad has also some limited dimentia going on and we both loved him. Her brother who she doesn't really talk or get along with anymore has taken over his care but no contact anymore from any of them. One reason for this we believed is that my W DID NOT attend her mothers funeral because of family disputes. My W has 9 brothers most are strange also. Now, I completely agree this has some hormonal elements but doesn't it some of this half to be with me also? Also, I agree with the assessment she may be running with adrenaline to keep her pain hidden. I dont for one minute believe she is completely happy living alone in her paid for Condo. Cadet, she knows all to well I always tried doing right for and by her. Not to say I didnt screw up with issues as I previously mentioned since I have been here. We did have issues. But, theres just so much that doesn't make sense about her leaving that alot of what you said above has got to be somewhat to very true. This is what drives me nuts. If it was really something like physical violence etc then I could deal with this crap a whole lot easier. So I am leaning on what you just posted above hoping it will help me to deal a little better. I am for the moment holding to not emailing anything to her as to morrow will be 2 weeks since any contact which by the way was initiated by her by giving me her new phone number in a surprise email. Although it was short and to the point she was driven by something to provide it to me. Weird, weird stuff because again, we havent talked on phone since she left 3 months ago. I put alot of things down here again so you can see that the facts of my WAW that you might see why I find this so difficult to deal with. Yes, I am doing better but as you know, it can still hurt 3 months after the fact. Let me ask you, you really see this as part of a bigger issue (a bomb in her blowing up) and doing this? I ask u as a vet because honestly when I really try to understand her and why, I cannot put logic to this mess.....Thanks again Cadet
