My husband and I have been married for three years, living together for four
What are your ages and do you have any children? Have you done any reading on MLC? If you're describing things accurately, it sounds like you were a pretty good wife. If so then he may be entering MLC.
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So I wonder, is there hope after a divorce?
Well, certainly people do reconcile after divorce, but often what happens is after divorce the LBS closes their heart to the WAS because they see no hope of reconciliation. So when the WAS eventually does approach them about reconciling, they've long since moved on with their life.
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Honestly, I don't know why he's filing so quickly, other than he says that he just wants to get on with his life.
Read Sandi's DB tips (sticky at top of forum). DO NOT bring up R, M or D talks. It's not unusual for the WAS to say they're filing for D right away, but then they don't do it. If the LBS talks about it constantly, then the WAS feels pressured to proceed. But if the LBS doesn't ever bring it up then it removes the pressure.
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I've since done a 180, as in, I've gone back to school to get a nursing degree, so I will never be in this position again.
That's great! That's what you need to do, focus on you. Rebuild your life. Show your H that you are going to be fine in life whether with or without him.
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My husband is very upset about paying alimony. He says that he doesn't want to, doesn't see why he should (since I worked in the home), etc.
Very selfish attitude, another indication that he may be entering MLC.
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Well. I feel like I did everything in the relationship.
Maybe he didn't see that as a positive thing. Maybe he felt like you were controlling and manipulative because you "did everything". I don't know the whole story obviously, but you need to try and step outside of your R and look at it more objectively and figure out why he wasn't happy.
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This has been the most painful thing I've ever been through in my life and, honestly, I don't know what to do, or what would really be successful.
Very sorry you're going through this, but practically all of us here have lived through the pain, are rebuilding our lives and can help you do the same. The healing takes time, lots of it. Just know that there IS still hope for your M, even if your H does push the D through there is still hope. Time is an amazing thing, it can change people and situations. Embrace time, take a deep breath and get ready for the long haul. Good luck!
