I am working through my threads and I see that I have been sabotaging myself with regards to my DBing efforts. I start to make a mental list of the things I have been doing wrong and the list got too long to keep mentally. I will have to put it down on paper but I can say from first glance that I have failed at DBing for the most part.
I do agree but we all do this! The important thing right now is that you have realized this and thereby you can adjust! Do NOT punish yourself for this – learn and adjust!
I am glad you came to this conclusion all by yourself because then I can leave the 2x4 in the closet
Do take the time to put it down on paper but also mix things in that you would like to do! I believe it will help you tremendously. It will be your own 37 rules. When you have done the list then make it action oriented as MWD describes and make sure that it is action you can make happen without help. This will help you focus on you and that’s what you have got to do for now IMO and a few others in your thread:
Originally Posted By: Spartan
What are you doing for YOU? GAL type stuff
Originally Posted By: SIS
Take care of yourself and start having some fun!
Originally Posted By: Labug
There's a world full of possibilities, you're the only one holding you back.
Originally Posted By: PositiveSpin
Focus on you and create goals that you have 100% control over.
I wrote my first post in your thread as an answer to a question! IMHO you have all the answer right in front of you but you have the exact same problems comprehending these as I have! I do understand this and I do get you!
You need to start doing what you know you should be doing! Act on brains and not on feelings! Focus on you! That’s the only way to be the spouse nobody would leave!
The best way to do this IMO is to make a set of measurable goals and then start working them. Evaluate, learn and adjust!
And do remember this:
Originally Posted By: AnotherStander
Right, it's a marathon. She loved you once, right? So now she has chosen not to love you. What makes you think she can't change her mind back again?
What will make it possible for her to do this?
All the best!
F
Me:44 W:43 D7, D5 (S11 from other R)
T: 8y - not M ILYB: 8. Mar 2013 W moved: 1. Aug 2013 LRT: 20. Aug 2013 _______________________________ Do or do not – there’s no try.
