One giant leap forward! - Part 3

[T1000]

Marriage Counselling day today.

Normally takes me 1.5 hours to get there. Left with 2 hours to get there.
Theres 3 really long roads that connect where I am to where wife is.
Check traffic report before I set off and the 1st road is closed to due a large accident.
I take the really scenic route. Takes me an extra 10 mins but so far so good.
As I approach the 2nd road they announce on the radio that the 3rd road is closed to due a large accident!!
Took another even longer scenic route.
Managed to get to the appointment 3 mins late.

She was really nice. Both W and I got on really well with her.

Lots of questions about our lives, our backgrounds, families, where we feel we are in the marriage.
I said I know I am married but I don't feel like I am.
She said so are you two feet in, one foot out, two feet out?
I said I have been two feet in for 12 months but I'm getting fed up with it. I am one foot in willing to work on the marriage but also one foot out ready to end it if we can't do anything with it.
Wife said she was one toe in.

A lot was said. The MC was trying to show me why W left and why at the time my W thought it was the only option.
The MC also brought up W leaving me and said that she abandoned me and took my kids away.
It wasn't as straight forward as that but she did bring it up. It was strange how she put it to my W and W sort of pulled a face and the MC said, you did abandon him and take his kids away, you might have had the right reasons to do it but that is what you did.
W accepted it. I was more upset than I thought I would be right then.
It was strangely therapeutic to see someone say that to my W and she took it.
I was able to say things that I had never brought up before too.
It was a very good session. There was a lot covered, it was 1.5 hours and I liked that.
I won't write a full rundown now as it's quite late but if I think of anything worth mentioning I will bring it up later.

Spent quite a bit of time discussing some of our issues and a new ways of tackling them. They were mainly to do with me not being passive and wife having more patience for now.

MC said that we need to spend some time together to re-connect with no kids.
W said that she want to spend time with me but I am holding back. I mentioned that every time we get close, which has been often in the last 12 months, W pulls away again and again. I'm getting fed up of it all crashing down. MC questioned wife about this and asked her if she understand why I feel like this and she needs to be careful.
We discussed when would be a good time. I said I would be glad to do it but I don't know when we could fit that in.
I said about work and having the kids and the driving and the MC turned to W and said when will you fit this in. W said if T1000 brings the kids back at lunch times on a Sunday we could do something then.
I was shocked, W is giving up some of her precious weekend to work on us. I couldn't believe it!!!

After we left W asked me what I thought. I said I was very pleased with it and it exceeded my expectations on what an MC can be or do for us.

She didn't have any thoughts about it going in, wasn't expecting much at all.
She really liked the MC. Thought the whole thing really good. Looking forward to going again.
She offered to pay for all of the next session because I paid for this one!!!

We agreed that we would go once a month and spend some time together just us on Sunday afternoons.

W said that she sees us spending the next year making us right again. I said I was glad she had a realistic time frame so there was no rush and we can give it all time to stick and get it right.

W asked me if we could all have dinner together before me and the kids left. I said that was fine. We talked more during dinner.
She has been texting me a fair bit tonight. She seems softer and more interested than before.

The MC has done something and that something appears to be very good up to now.

Another giant leap forward and very productive day (minus the traffic!).