I am titanium

[RosaLinda]

Hi Raine. I just dropped by to check up on you after being mostly out of touch since Friday (mainly working but attended a party too ) and am a little nervous that you haven'y posted since Thursday. I hope you're okay and all is well and quiet at  your place and in your life. That you are having fun with the kids, teaching them to bake and all It's a good thing Wonka came over to help you stuff H back in that oven!

Have you found a counselor for H yet? I agree you'll do a better and much more thoughtful job picking one out than he would. I wanted to warn you that the first IC I tried did not even believe in MLC. She said it is just a term men use to excuse their bad behavior! Counseling should help him even if he is just going to C to appease you. 

Are you still feeling so strong Raine? Hope so! Please don't allow any momentary jolts of regret weaken your resolve. We all have them. It'll pass!

Complicated I'll have to go catch up on your thread. I'm so sorry your H went back to OW. I bet he IS worried that you're serious, and trying to backpedal. What exactly do you mean when you say you're "done"? With your marriage? Done standing?  I'm sorry it came to this but glad you're holding your ground. 

Only you can know what is right for you, and what ever you decide, I'm behind you 100%.

You asked "I noticed you said that he did not really say he was sorry and also I guess he didn't ask for forgiveness. The same with my h. Why is this? Normal people would feel terrible and say they were sorry and beg for forgiveness. Why don't our h's?"

In my definitely non-expert opinion, MLCers neither feel sorry nor apologize because they have adopted a cock-eyed view that since they are not perfectly happy - they are no longer young and the chance that their dreams will all come true is rapidly fading - that life is not fair. They have lived the past X number of years supporting their family and doing what other people (wife, boss) want them to. But now it is THEIR time to do what they want for a change. They rationalize their behavior by convincing themselves that they deserve it, whatever "it" is that catches their fancy. A car, a roulette table, an affair. And since "it" is their right, there's no reason to apologize. They might feel a bit sorry that you are devastated, but hey, you were just standing in the way of obtaining that one elusive "it" that is going to improve thir life and make all their pain go away. So...why apologize?! Silly girl!

[complicated]

Rosa (I like that name)sometimes I need that 2x4 you know? As soon as I get it through my thick head that I was the cause and why should he have to apologize for something I caused I'll be much better off.

When I said I was done I meant I was done fighting for my m and standing. Now h says he wants to work on our m but he has to get out of his "mess" with ow first. And deal with his issues.

I am worried about Raine too. I keep checking for her. I really do think that she needs to hold her ground and her h needs to realize she is amazing and he is about to lose her.

Same with your h Rosa. He is going to get a strong dose of RT soon and that should do it. lol Meanwhile you will be having an awesome time in London.

[Wonka]

Raine baby, I'm really missing my cooking partner in the kitchen! Come on and slide back over here.

[Raine]

Ahh, sucked right back in. Thanks Wonka! You made me laugh today and couldn't help but post a response back.

My sitch is just weighing me down. For the first time in a long time, this week I've really been about me, and I'm okay with that, selfish or not. I have just wanted to run away from it, but no where to run.

I decided to head up to one of my favorite camping spots as a kid. Threw the boys in the car with all the quieting electronic devices, cranked the music, and here I am. Great place to write about it, and leave it all here.

Had to reminded H that it was the deadline for C. Got quite an earful about how busy he is. He was pretty upset I wasn't backing down or taking any crap. He is taking the search very seriously--now. He has the insurance done for it and waiting on two other C to call him back tomorrow so he can pick one. So we'll see. I figure this could be a good thing or the C could do a massive amount of damage. It's out of my hands.

Went to a concert the other night. It conflicted with H's typical scheduling, so when I offered to find someone else a few days before, he said yes, find someone. He gets on edge if he deviates from his schedule. He then proceeded to listen to the group for two days straight and post multiple updates about them on fb. What the heck? Yet he maintained he didn't want to go. I asked about 8 people and all had conflicts. Finally last minute I asked H if he would just go, and he said yes. It was absolutely amazing. It didn't matter who I was there with. It was just me and the lead singer...if you know what I mean. I loved every moment of it, and so did H. He said it was great and very unique. But didnt say anything thanking me or glad he didnt miss it. Super funny to me how that all played out. Like an insolent teen.

OW are all being ignored, but they sure are trying. I'm gearing up for one of them to show up at the house. You know how that plays all out in my head: cops, restraining order, a funny story to tell for the rest of my life--yup all planned out

Things are good...really good. They're good despite him or perhaps in spite of him. Life goes on, and life feels good. It feels great to be me, to really like being me. And it's great that others around me see that too.

[Whiterose]

Hi raine

Sounds like you're taking some much needed space for yourself and that it's doing great things for you......way to go!!

All the best to you

[RosaLinda]

It's pretty funny H did nothing about getting a counselor intil he realized you weren't backing down on your deadline. He better watch his step or he'll find himself in detention at MLC High. Ms. Snodderly doesn't take any guff!

I'm glad you enjoyed the concert and are enjoying life, in spite of H! And that none of his crazy women, OW 1-57, have not shown up at your door yet. Stay strong!

[TSquared2]

He better watch his step or he'll find himself in detention at MLC High.

Is that a lawyers' office?

[Raine]

WR: it does feel good. It feels good to know that this is not forever. This is not my forever life. It's a temporary madness to carry me from one period of my life to the next. And the next part of my life is pretty darn amazing. It'll be amazing because I say so. Because I am going to make it happen. By the way, I absolutely love Mumford and Sons. Right at the top of my list at the moment. (Just for music...maybe more...no I swear just for their music.)

Sweet Linda, now admit it, don't you just want to have one of these doe-eyed OW show up to my door? She wouldn't know what hit her. No frying pans, I swear, but a full throttle diatribe that would leave her spinning for awhile. C'mon, I know you'd love to see THAT post.

T2: Ba doom ching? <smirk>

[Wonka]

Sweet Linda, now admit it, don't you just want to have one of these doe-eyed OW show up to my door? She wouldn't know what hit her.

Nope, none of them will be doe-eyed lassies. They'll probably look more like 'Bill the Cat' from Opus.

[TSquared2]

Nope, none of them will be doe-eyed lassies. They'll probably look more like 'Bill the Cat' from Opus. grin

Lmao...made me spew water...what is it with the humor here? I always take a drink right before I read something hilarious...that never used to happen often, here it almost daily...<ack!...pfffsssstpf...hairball!>