I'd go with his first number - 12 or 13 - that's probably the correct one. He's just trying to backtrack now so he'll keep you on the hook ("Oh, just 4 or 5? That's not so bad then").
He's got a serious problem with infidelity. Maybe his problem is sex addiction (would he even go to an SLAA meeting? Like AA but for sex and love addicts - I have a friend who attends). Or maybe he's just terminally selfish.
He's clearly trying to placate you, as he senses you are pulling away. But of course, he's doing none of the things that a truly remorseful spouse who was trying to repair the relationship would do, is he?
