wife hardends heart-2

[planet]

OM changed his fb profile picture to D4. When i saw it, i got angry and immediately sent a text demanding him to remove it. OM removed it minutes later. That little F***ker. I don't think anyone would do that unless related. I wouldn't. W wouldn't too.
OM is getting brazen by the day. I don't know what W is going to do with him. She's maintaining him as close friend.
What should i do?
Do i confront W again? Tell her my boundaries? I do not want OM close to my kids.

[planet]

I'm raising a RED FLAG here.
Please help

[PatientMan]

Sorry, planet. Advice for your current question is out of my league. I am following along.

-PM

[planet]

Thanks PatientMan.
Anyway, after the fb incident, i decided not to do anything. no point confronting W. i can guess what's she's gonna say and i'm not going to like it. probably gonna blow up in my face.
OM sent a text later asking me not to be angry with her. says she's unaware of this. he proceeded to upload another profile picture of someone's daughter. i think he's sending a 'message'. well, i think it's creepy and childish. and i thought I was the immature one.
seems to me W haven't told him about our D yet. thankfully i did not confront W. i figured this will upset her and withdraw even further. she has been showing some positive attitude towards me last couple of days and i don't want to risk that.

[PatientMan]

I think it's wise to do nothing until you're sure of what to do. You can't unring a bell.

-PM

[Lostinpain]

I agree with PM. What he did was wrong, OM or not. I think one should always ask permission before posting pictures of other's children. However, so long as he no longer does it don't make an issue of it. This type of behavior has a way of showing itself publically in time.

[MrBond]

"I do not want OM close to my kids."

Unfortunately you can't stop this. You signed the papers for a D, so he's going to be around more. When the OM contacted you to not get mad at your W, you should lay the boundary with him. That your kids will not be used in that way.

[planet]

I think one should always ask permission before posting pictures of other's children.

posting pictures is one thing but to use it as profile pic? that's kinda creepy. I know for a fact W thinks the same way too.
I was not mad at W when he pulled this stunt. I was going show her what this guy did. I stop short because she's a WAW now. Things are different now.

Unfortunately you can't stop this. You signed the papers for a D, so he's going to be around more. When the OM contacted you to not get mad at your W, you should lay the boundary with him. That your kids will not be used in that way.

Maybe i should but I was pretty clear about my boundaries when i confronted him the last time. I guess he's going to keep challenging me. I don't really want to respond to his every 'brownie' move.

[lost_hope]

So sorry you are going through this. This would drive me absolutely bonkers. He is definitely doing this to rile you up. It was totally appropriate for you to demand he remove it (wth does he think he is??) but other than these absolute necessary times don't waste any breathe on him. He's a scavenger poking around another man's wife. I agree with Mr. Bond you can't really stop him from being around your kids unless you can prove somehow that he's a threat to them (in which case you may have to go to court or police to prove that ... and that's assuming that's the family law in Malaysia).

Try to fous on yourself and your daughters, some focus on wife if you think there's a chance, and zero focus on that scavenger unless it affects your kids. Ew, what a creep.

[planet]

I got this feeling that W wants to have some sort of communication. Whenever we walked into each other, her eyes will meet mine and she looks like she wants to say something but nothing comes out.
I mostly walk away or continue whatever i was doing because it's just too awkward. Funnily, I have nothing i want to share with her at all.