W and I went to MC on the 26th together. BAD IDEA!!! She related to MC and me that she wants a D. We spent the last half of the session trying to figure out how to proceed.
When we got home later that evening, after dinner (together with the kids) I asked her if she had talked to an attorney and she said she had. I ask if she retained an attorney, she did.
This decision must have been weighing in on her very heavily because after dinner, she was almost giddy. She was back to her old self again and was acting like the woman I knew for these past 12 years.
I told her that it took a lot of courage to make that decision. I said I don't agree with it and that her decision will affect a lot of people. The rest of the evening was pleasant.
The next morning, she was going to run some errands and she was still acting like the woman I married. I said good bye to her and said that it was good to see her being her old self again.
Since then, we have been getting along and interacting well together. No arguments, no more limbo for me, and none of the mean and nasty negativity from her, that I have been experiencing since the BD.
I am still DBing and PMA. I will still be a STANDER until the D is final and I can confirm she has started another relationship. Until then, I have to STAND so that I know I did all I could do to the best of my ability.
Small amount of relief for me because I don't feel like I am in limbo anymore. At least I have direction now and accept the fact that I can do nothing to stop this from happening. That acceptance gave me some peace. I can now stop worrying about what she wants and does because now I know for certain what she wants.
