Sorry to see you didn't get your romantic snowy weekend
I agree with so much of what MPT is saying. Your W isn't *choosing* to be an ND/LD - something is keeping her from wanting to reach out sexually to you. That was the problem in my sitch, and that is precisely why I *was* LD. I *knew* my LD was a problem, but until I knew *why* I was LD - I thought H should be able to masturbate if I wasn't into it. This is just my take on things, without knowing your W's side of the story... this is just comparing any similarities between her and I...
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I think she has some very serious issues that need to be addressed by the two of you. As much as you need to stand your ground to be heard, you need to work very hard to hear what she is saying too. I think she has some very important, valid issues with you. She may not be just making it 'about her' to be a victim and manipulate the situation. It is a marriage and it is as much about her as it is you. I sense some very deep dissatisfaction from your wife. *MPT


Amen! I was LD until my H heard what I had been saying to him (for 7 yrs). He even admitted that he'd heard me say what my issues were, but he never grasped them or gave them much thought. Once he did though, well, I changed my username! If she feels misunderstood or disrespected in some way (by you), she'll be LD.
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She says that my "obsession" with sex is a real turn off. She says that when I do nice things for her, she feels as if I am doing them in order to get sex from her. She says that when I leave her alone, don't touch her, give her space, that I am doing this in order to get sex from her.


Yikes, that sounds very familiar... like stuff I've said. To her, you seem obsessed with sex; not showing her love in a way she likes to receive it. What makes her feel loved? From the sounds of it, you've already given her alot of "her love" - but have you been giving it to her without any expectation? Do you hint around or make her feel guilty at all if she's not in the mood? Do whatever makes her feel loved for a while and don't even stop to check for the feedback... just do it because you love her for a while. Heck, you said you were giving her some more time
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I thought your idea, Corri, was good (to send her an email), yet I also want to give her some room. So I didn't send it. I am starting to feel as depressed and hopeless as CeMar.


My H has been sending me quick, cute e-greetings every couple of days for the past few weeks... just to say hi or thank me for something or whatever is on his mind at the time. It's simple but very sweet. It tells me he thought about me while we were apart and makes me feel special. Make her smile or chuckle!

Pam