I have no idea what I'm doing

[chl0901]

I want her to be healthy, happy, and whole again. I just don't want them to be happy together. That's the raw, petty, reality of it. I want AP to suffer the loss of my W just like I did. I want my ex-friend to know what I feel like. I know that makes me sound like a horrible person. There is so much anger there. Some of it mis-directed because my W owns it. It's so much easier to point all of that fire at AP because I do still love my SXBW. I do. I still love her.

I don't think you sound like a horrible person at all. I bet a lot of people on here feel the same way. I know I would if my situation ended up that way!

You keep doing you! Have fun at dinner!