He has expressed that in our marriage, there were only a handful of times he felt I needed him. That is true. I don't know how to let H feel he is needed, because I am not sure what it looks like.
Originally Posted By: tori2012
I always avoided asking Joe for help bc I didn't want to bother him, and he also said that he never felt needed and he wanted to feel needed. He said that was one of the reasons he had an A.
This is me totally.
My H complained of the same, not feeling needed. I didn't want to be a burden, so I did almost everything on my own. As uRworthy said it's healthy to want and not need. But I guess you have to make a man feel that way in many cases?
I remember when I was 20 yrs old, I visited my aunt & uncle. My uncle took me to the mall one day, the next day I wanted to go back with my aunt to get something I saw. My uncle got in his car and had us follow him, in our car, to the mall so he could show us the exact door we entered so I could easily find what I saw the day before, b/c he felt I wouldn't remember. Then he was going to drive somewhere else he needed to go across town while we were at the mall. My aunt said she thought it was silly we had to follow him, but she went along with it b/c sometimes you have to let a man be a man and feed his ego, let him feel needed. I still to this day think it was stupid, but I understand it better now.
me: 30 H:30 tgthr:7 m:4 no kids 5 counseling sessions initiated by H as a LR: Oct 2012 long distance marriage b/c of work since Nov 2012 official BD: July 2013 nothing filed 1/1/14 I dropped the rope
