I had a pretty good weekend, haven't seen or heard from W since Thursday. I haven't snooped on her facebook, haven't heard about what she is doing or where she is going, haven't really had any text contact even. I really am starting to believe that just keeping her out of my sight, and having little to no contact, will help me to move forward.
I get daughter back today. I actually didn't miss her as much as I usually do, even though I had no contact with her either. Perhaps that is because I had stayed busy with work and socializing this weekend. I am however, really looking forward to spending a good quality week with her. I still brutally hate the situation that this has put her in. She doesn't deserve to have a broken family. She doesn't deserve any of this. My heart still bleeds for that part. I worry about how it will effect the course of her life, as well as mine as a father. OM is starting to slide into the "step dad" role. He is taking them camping for a week. He is contemplating buying daughter a motorcycle. He has been putting them up in his home and playing house. I struggle with that a LOT. No matter how I look at that, it will effect my connection with daughter. Those are the things a father should be doing with his daughter, not some OM. At least, those are my feelings.
For GAL, I have still been hanging in the same circles, socializing at my business, BBQing with friends and family, an occasional dinner and drinks out, but for the most part staying close to home. I have been so slammed with work, I have not had time to branch out. I need to meet more new people, and I need to start building a new circle of friends. I am still hanging, for the most part, with couples. I need to work on that.
In regards to my anger, I feel that I really making gains on controlling it. I had a little opportunity to test it this weekend. My sister and I had a blowout, in which I stayed perfectly calm and controlled. She spit venom. In the past, I would have come literally un-glued, under the circumstances. This time, I didn't lash out. I stayed controlled. I focused on the issues and didn't bring other things into it. I validated her and expressed appreciation, all happening while she was being very rude and unkind. That's clear growth for me. I am happy about that. I am happy about the way I handled it, and I am happy that I was able to control my feelings.
