Getting back on the horse gracefully....

[mkultra]

Hi,
I had to get caught up! This is a great conversation because many of us are going through a divorce, getting over the fact that the marriage is over, trying to move one, but we are still connected to our exes.

I have been separated for about six years and divorced a few months and I truly see how our close connection has been quite a crutch and a turn off for perspective lovers.

He has always put the kids first and they were little so always asking, "Why can't Mommy come to the beach/park/movie?, too" For a while, he would bring his GF, not the one he cheated on me with. It was fine.

However, I rarely brought my kids around men I saw. Just friends, not intimate partners.

It is such a tricky dance. I guess looking back, it would have been better for me to have more boundaries with my exH. I should work on that now so I can truly move on. We are no longer married and if I do not do it, he will, and that will feel like ANOTHER divorce!

Good luck. Hope my hindsight from the ex wife's POV helps. I know we are in different sitches.