Ruby, I have no desire to contact H also. It has been like that for quite some time. I’m OK with him contacting me, I’m not nervous anymore. I don’t think I’m detached though. I still cannot get him out of my head most of the time. I’m trying to figure it out too. I think I don’t initiate contact because I don’t want to be disappointed and/or anxious, it is kind of a self defense mechanism for me.
Take care of yourself.
The key for me is to let go of the expectation contacting H will bring you disappointment or hope or other feelings.
This was the hardest part. Once you are there it gets easier But you have to be willing to feel those feeling yet recognize them for what they are.
But you have to be willing to feel those feeling yet recognize them for what they are.
