I just want to weigh in with a different perspective to consider. I've been here for a really long time, have seen a variety of experiences, miracles and bizarre outcomes. Some are surprises and some are not. I will say my words with those experiences in mind, including my real life experiences with family. I urge you to work on that anger and judgement for not only your sake but for your children.
I have personally seen very unpleasant outcomes - predictably - when parents bring on the moral police and throw the spouse under the bus. What those kids need the most from you is for you to show the vulnerable, forgiving side so they learn love and compassion for others.
I'm not saying you have to agree with your W's choices or morals. But those kids have her for a mom, and they don't have the choice to divorce either one of you. All they want is to be able to love and be loved by both of you.
The predictable outcome I see most of the time is that the parent who vilifies the other is ultimately rejected by the kids. No matter who is at fault. Please don't put them or yourself in that position. It's a trap. And you and the kids will be hurt the most.
You live through your actions and not your words. Your kids are paying attention, so give them your best you that you can.
I say this in kindness and hope you can see something good in my post to you.
Good luck.
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
