Hoping for WAS to come home

[JaxFL14]

Well my IC confirmed what you all were saying. Still pursuing my W. so she challenged me to stop but also to ask the wife to stop texting me about non important issues right now. Such as her texts about missing the boys, or something funny they said. She said it intaginizes me to talk and not allowing myself to detach. She also said that she needs to stop asking me for help such as cutting wood for a project she did, fixing a leaking pipe at her salon that I installed or changing of an outlet at her new home. And of course my attempts at keeping or having a physical relationship. It's hard cause that's where you think that if I cut all of this contact out that she will like it and forget about me, but yes, I know, she can't have me and not have me, she can't use me like a husband when she needs me and me pursuing is NOT going to being her back. I understand and have actually found a little peace since that appt. my W can't know she has me when she needs me, can't know that if she wants sex then she got it, can't use me to fix her things but not want to be my W. So I WILL do this.
One thing she did tell me to do was when I tell my W about refraining from non important texting because I need to make some personal decisions, she suggested that I tell her I'd like a "check in" on October first. I told her what the book says about not talking about the relationship unless my W does and she said she understands but as long as I can just ask, listen and then accept the answer without pleading my case then she thinks I should. Your still happy where you are? Ok and drop it and check back in in a few months. You'd like to give counseling a try? Ok and move on slowly. She said she feels I should do this because of my W's lack of any sort of action. She left cause she says she wants a divorce for reasons of " I'm just not in love anymore but your awesome" but it's been 4 months and she says she has no plans of actually filing. For reasons of money or laziness or maybe she's waiting till I give up hope to not hurt me more. Or is she in no hurry cause she's using my health insurance cause she has a few things she uses it a lot for. I don't know, I really hole she wouldn't be like that but at this point I don't know her. Anyway, I'm starting to ramble.
So I ask what you think of the planned check-in on October first? That date will be 7 months since BD. 6 since she moved out. Fire away!!