Just don't know where to find the strength for this. Today was long and stressful, with the early cab ride to IC, walk to store, cab ride back. Didn't sleep well last night. Napped when I should have been working. <sigh>
If it weren't for the cats, I think I would just leave and go visit relatives in turn until they got sick of me, and/or flop at my brother's house for a good long while. As long as there's internet, I can work.
I shouldn't do this, but I can't help wondering if W felt guilty here, knowing I was walking because she selfishly took the car, and knowing how I hate it here and how much I was looking forward to the move. I just know in my heart that she is not finding happiness externally. I don't know how I know this, but I do. Just the little signs, maybe.
But, that doesn't help me when she's pushing herself and pushing my buttons if I don't keep to my resolve and my LRT. :-(
