Yeah it's me, the not so dedicated DBer with my 2 cents worth....
Your H keeps asking YOU how you feel and YOU keep validating HIS comfort. Why NOT tell him exactly how you feel? You can do that with the same serenity as you have demonstrated everything else.
You ARE permitted to be HONEST about YOUR needs and feelings. That doesn't make them a demand or an effort to control him. BUT he keeps asking you HOW this is effecting you and YOU keep pretending that everythings PEACHY when both HE and YOU know that what he's about to do is UNACCEPTABLE if the goal is to rebuild your M/R.
Your silent surrender is giving him permission to act out his selfish needs and allows him to appease his guilt (for what he damn well knows its NOT an honorable thing) by reminding himself that, "Well hell, she's okay with it so it MUST be good for ME."
It's true that it appears that he's about to walk no matter what you say...but do you have to let him go with your 'blessing'? I don't think so. T2
