H was in town all week (often travels, so this was unusual) I worked 2 nights and was out last night with a new church group...Alpha Training. So, we have barely been around each other....just sleep side by side (no touching), talk briefly in the morning when I drive him to the train. I had plans tonight for a mixed doubles tennis match, but they were cancelled. He was going to join his "co-workers" for a drink after work...a usual routine on Fridays. ( I always figure that OW is there, since she is one of his main co-workers) He usually comes home between 8-9pm on Fridays. I have tried to keep busy on Fri nights and often are not home. Or at least act "as if" He said this morning he has to work most of Sat & Sun...common this time of year for him. I said I had to work on Sat, too.
He mentioned just before he got out of the car this morning, that he really needed to figure out his personal life....that he is putting too much energy into his work. I think he implied, that he is thinking of moving out come March or so. He mentioned that 2 weeks ago. Tho, he has mentioned moving out on his wown several times over the past 5 months....and has not, yet. It looms in my mind. I usually say nothing....I think if I agree, that would encourage him to leave, and if I debated it, it might push him out faster. It's his deal. He'll have to figure it all out. It bothers me deep inside, tho. But I've been reading a lot of "Hoping's" sitch over the past 2 years and have gotten lots of comfort in everyone's input regarding separation. Her sitch is working out now....very encouraging. Same with Lostlove. And KAW has given lots of good input, too. You all help many of us whether you know it or not.
My goals for this weekend:
Act "as if" when H is around.
Be happy with myself...cheerful
Exercise around H (he always watches me and seems intrigued.
