Okay...

Really nice guy. Texts me to say good luck yesterday and then I didn't text back all day after a text and haven't heard from him since..... I texted him this morning saying I was out last night and often don't check my phone ( true). And that if I don't text back to not take it personally....also asked what he wanted to do if weather didn't hold for picnic. No answer yet

Now, the reason I wasn't picking up cell.....was out with H!

Asked if he wanted to have lunch Thursday, but he was busy and suggested Friday. I was in town because I had a surf lesson that night after school in morning. Which meant four hours in between. Well, surf lessons were canceled. So we had lunch and drank wine ( sorry ps). A lot of wine.

H asks me if I have had a date yet. I say yes. He says he is happy about it, but also admits later on in the night ( yeah....the night), that he didn't know how he felt.

I also find out that xgf asked him to choose.....her or his friendship with me. He choose me, apparently. I said that I cut him loose three weeks ago at his request and that it hurt, but I did it because loving someone means you want them to have the best chance at happiness.

He said he just couldn't do it, the thought of me not in his life is something he could not contemplate. That I am his best friend and we share a history together. He also admitted xgf was a rebound and a little immature. That he asked several friends and therapist about her asking him to choose and all said he shouldn't have to.

That being said, H is dating someone else....he says she is a lot like me(!!!!) but that are at different stages in their lives. She is my age, but with young kids. We all know that H is really not a kid person, so it doesn't worry me too much.

He also told OP that he and I are best friends and that whoever dated him would have to accept our relationship. I said to H, aside from the fact that we are still wildly attracted to each other, no one will put up with our friendship. Of course we had had quite a bit to drink and were very honest.

He also said he could never go back to being my husband because it almost destroyed him. I am just waiting that one out, I think.

The fact that I had a date really allowed h to open up. I said that earlier I wasn't ready and he wanted me to date because it would make him feel less guilty. He acknowledged that. Now he said he was excited for me and knew I was more of a toe dipper rather than a dive right in person.

He also acknowledged that he wanted me to see what else there was out there, like he was. That if I wanted to be with him it was because I had had the chance to explore the other options. He said that he was not the person for me. I said yes he was, and he could not tell me who was and wasn't, but if he thought I was not the person for him, I would understand. He didn't reply to that.

H also admitted lying about ML and the emotions. He said they were all there, and that when he said he felt nothing he lied.

Still going on my date, H still dating OP, but I feel that we got a lot out in the open. H said OM is very interested if he wanted second date and I didn't kiss him on first lol!!

H looked at me this morning and said, we have a really weird relationship. I said yes...yes we do.

H repeated a few times that New OP is very much like me.....I also know he is waiting for me to finish school so I can have a job. I think he wants to have so e financial independence as well, since he supports us all....I certainly don't begrudge him that!!

I guess. Xgf wrote him a dear John letter from overseas. H was not impressed lol. I told him that I was truly sorry it didn't work out for him, that he was very much in love. He looked at me and said that sometimes people label emotions wrongly, and what he thought was love was simply lust and gratitude that she appreciated all that he did, when I just took him for granted.

The boy is growing up.

I won't be using apt. Though. Even though he has offered me keys and stay whenever, I don't want to be that person.

He questioned my off fb and said that a lot of people follow my posts and they would be disappointed. I said that I had the desire to live in the now. That fb just has you lamenting past, speculating about future, that I didn't want to be that person, stalking his fb page, seeing what he is up to etc. that I am taking at least summer off on fb. He said he so understood that.

And that is where it stands and h also asked if spending the night would make a difference about the next date with new guy. I said no smile. Just as it would not affect his dates....