I have had such a hard time understanding why this is all happening, and that is probably a big reason for my depression.
You have got to let go of that need to understand, because you will never understand. Your W probably doesn't understand either. WAS's are driven by emotions, not logic. You can't hope to understand emotionally-driven behavior.
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I just don't get why we can't fix the issues.
It's not a flat tire you're dealing with, it's WAS emotions. Emotions can't be "fixed". They can change over time though. LOTS of time.
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However, she is still spending every cent of her money on her self enjoyment, and saving nothing to secure her future.
^^^Not your issue^^^
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I am still putting a roof over her head, still paying her utility bills.
^^^Who are you blaming for this?^^^
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She is broke and not making an effort to move forward on her own and that simply pisses me off.
= not detached
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What she does with her life can't concern me anymore.
Exactly!
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She wanted this, not me.
There's that blaming again. Your W felt that this was a last resort to what she saw as a horrible marriage. She didn't "want" this, she felt like she had to do it to save herself. Try to have some compassion towards her, remember that this has been very painful for her too. Remember that you played a very big part in things getting to this point.
