I guess if I'm telling you anything I'd do different it would be to do less data collection and if it seems like a favored topic maybe try to appear less interested in mom's personal life. Anyway, I sometimes think as I'm writing to other people, what is it I should be learning from this...and I think for me I could be doing a better job myself of being less judgmental of my H, who is not up for father of the year award in my book. I am 100% there, 100% committed, I'm trying so hard to really be there for my kids, and really fretting for their wellbeing, in stark difference to my H. My feeling self-righteous is not good for me or my kids; maybe I need to relax my judgment on my H. So I might be talking to me more than you here. Something to go ponder.
What Mom's up to probably only amounts to about 3% of what my S and I talk about. It's not just an easy topic to start a dialogue on - we have lots of other things we discuss. We've built our own life outside of what his Mom may or may not be doing. We've always bonded well and we're a lot closer since my W left the home.
That 3% we discuss is probably the most noteworthy things pertinent to my situation here, though. So it probably sounds like we're talking about my W a lot more than we are.
The onus is on me to just be the best Dad I can be for my S. I do have to fill in some of the holes where my W just simply isn't stepping up to the plate. I am handling everything with the school, doctor and dentist visits, he goes to church with me every Sunday, we make meal plans, and so on. He still needs Mom, though, and I know there are roles I cannot fill in that regard.
