Birthday is coming up!

[JJAC2005]

JT...
I know we have some similar comparisons in our sits....but the amount of time I let things go has played huge to win back favorable contact in my case.
I'm not saying don't send a card....but if you do, do it with "No" strings or expectations attached, and leave it at that.

I wasn't ever totally dark as in not contacting her....I couldn't seem to go only about a month before the urge to reach out in a friendly way with a short little text or email saying "hey".
However, the FB thing....best advice is to get off and stay off for a min of 3 months....it does you more harm than you think!
You can use that time frame to really get a better grasp of your own life and directions.....plus she will notice, more than you know trust me....mine did.
My ex had her 40th birthday back in early May, and Mothers Day was close to follow....You have to remember that I was married to her for 7 plus years, and I was always given the task of picking things up for her to be given to her from her kids...they spend one week here and the other week with their bio-dad.
Anyway I placed a few things on her front porch really early Mothers Day morning that made a huge connection to some of the things she liked and we enjoyed together.
I made up 2 really nice decorative planters of strawberry plants from the patch we had planted out back on the farm together...these produce berries thru the month of June...plus I picked about 10 lbs of fresh asparagus (something I introduced to her that she had never ate before meeting me, and now she loved) warping it up in neat bundles all placed in a wicker basket with a few apple blossoms on top, and inside a box a nice fitting women's Detroit Tigers jersey personalizes with Kid Rock and the number 40 on the back....she loves the Tigers and Kid Roch had a 40th b-day bash a year earlier but the theme still fit perfectly!
My card was made out as if it were being sent from the dogs...the only 2 children we had together, and I sort of got stuck with.
I didn't expect her to say anything....but she did send me a thank you text. I heard later that I really hit a home run with my gesture thru the kids....and she was actually wearing the jersey!

I will say this again though...this is a marathon....no a sprint!
The time you are apart is best used on yourself in becoming the type of mn only a fool would walk away from....you have to develop a ton of patience! Believe me, I know how hard this is....but hang in there!
Let go the old relationship....let it die, so tat something else can grow from it....and wait to build something new and better on a much more fertile ground!