To little Too late

[2little2late]

At least that's what my wife told me. I am 49 and my wife is 40. We have been married for 14 years with a 9 year old daughter. About a year 1/2 ago we had an argument that pushed her over the edge. Since then we have had no intimacy at all. No holding hands. No kisses. No sex. Barely a hug. She finally told me she wanted to separate 6 months ago. She said that she had emotionally left our marriage a long time ago. I think because of our daughter (9), she never left or pushed me out.
To each other on a daily basis we are like a happy married couple. Day to day life we laugh and go out, have fun with friends and family but deep down she has resentment and feels that because of me she has missed out on life. She would say that we feel like roommates but like most males I could not understand the message she was sending me because I can’t read between the lines. I took her for granted that I would always have her and it was just our stress that was causing doubt.
There always seems to be a final straw though and I am good at finding it. She and I both work a lot and have a mountain of bills but in my mind I always tried to tell her that she was beautiful and I love her but that wasn’t what she wanted to hear. She wanted me to show her. I have made all of the classic mistakes, not trying hard enough to be romantic, becoming distant. I had become someone completely different than the man she once loved and loved her back. After months of trying to convince her to think my way I guess that I have given up. Now after all of my failures and her resolve I have told my wife that I hear in voice and see in her Eyes that she is serious about this and won't change. During our last argument of trying to convince her to just try to save our marriage I broke down in my daughter’s bedroom at the thought of the pain we are about to cause her. She is a sweet and innocent girl and I would give my life for her in an instant so I gave up the fight and gave into my wife’s request.
I told her that I would not try and change her mind anymore and she had won. I was done. My concern was now for our daughter and keeping up the charade of happy parents. Hell I have been living without intimacy for almost 2 years now that the hardest part was acceptance. Now that I have accepted this I have emotionally tried to start checking out of our relationship.

I have been married before and have fallen out of love and back in love with the same person so I always seem to have some sense of hope but my wife is stubborn and I don’t know if she will budge. She has her cake and is eating it to. I work out of town but we still act like a happy family on the weekends.

What advice can you give me…Yeah right. Good luck!