New and need encouragement

[Not Quitting]

Haven't been posting for a while - computer issues.

H stopped by last night on his way to a buddy's, mainly to pick up some mail that's still being delivered here. S13 was glad to see him, but didn't run into his arms like he did on the 1st visit - guess he's getting too used to his dad not being around. .

H was a more talkative than he has been lately, and the only time he even looked at his cell phone was to text his buddy to make sure he had arrived home so he could head round there. That's very unusual for him as recently he's normally texting back and forth to two or three different people. He also showed a lot more common sense than he has been. He's been cycling to and from work since he moved out (doesn't drive) but as he was going to be drinking last night he took the bus. A few months ago that wouldn't have stopped him - he'd have still cycled. Is the fog starting to lift a bit? Not reading anything into though - still a long way to go before that happens.

H gave S13 some cash - he's off to sleep-away camp next week and needs to take "pocket money" with him. I had asked if H would be willing and/or able to put in some cash but he hadn't answered, so I wasn't actually expecting him to put in anything. It's going to be hard next week when S13 is away, but I guess it'll be a good time to do some GAL activities. Money is still very tight but I'm sure I can find something to do. Not sure what yet as all my friends are married, I've never been much of a socializer (don't mix and mingle well, and never have - sisters were surprised when I got married because it meant that I'd actually had to talk to someone for more than a couple of minutes LOL) and the thought of going to a bar/club just doesn't appeal (one of the issues my H has developed with me lately although he knew that when we got married).

I'm finding that I'm a lot less emotional even after H leaves. When he first moved out it was all I could do not to burst into tears around him, and I definitely did after seeing him for any reason. It's only been two weeks, but I certainly feel more relaxed both when apart from him and when I'm around him. And last night when he left, although that empty feeling was still there, I didn't feel any need to cry. Guess that means I'm finally getting this detaching part down.