Something I found out today has led me to a deeper understanding of XH's actions.
I am going through the very few financial docs that XH submitted to the court under discovery.
Just about fell off my chair to see that a couple of months after BD, OW had "loaned" XH's business (the one that has been failing for years and was propped up by my income and for which I had to mortgage the house) $15,000.
There's probably more loans from her, but i don't have access to more recent records from his business.
She has also been providing him with a place to live since he left, taking him on luxury holidays to Europe, buying him a new wardrobe, paying his employee's salaries.
XH is in so deep financially with OW that even if the fog did ever lift and he had regrets about leaving his family, he would be unable to extricate himself from his financial obligations to her.
She literally 'bought' him. Or alternatively, he has prostituted himself to keep his business afloat.
He took all of my assets, those of my parents and also those of our kids to keep his business going, and when that ran out, he moved on to OW and started doing the same.
He must loathe himself.
How strange that the business is so important to him. It was never viable and yet he's been using other people's money to keep it going for around 10 years. He must not believe he has any identity independent of it.
