How is he going to prove anything? He has no witnesses. The kids can't testify. It's his word against yours. He has no doctor records, no bruises, no injuries. And how much bigger is he than you?
He's a jerk. Maybe you should get a restraining order.
Imagine poor H getting beat up by sweet lil BRNR. Lol! It's ridiculous. I'm sure the police are rolling their eyes at this.
These clowns never cease to amaze me.
WH
AT BD: WH 41, J 43; Bomb 2/5/2012 Two kids, one dog D Final 6/18/14 J marries OW 1/24/15 "No matter where you go, there you are"
B, The mlcer lives in a fantasy world and yes, they will pull out the stops to punish us. Definitely pursue the claims that you filed because you will need to show that you did call about him. What he is doing now is retaliating against you for your calling the police on him.
He is not to be trusted and I would filed a protective order against him today. I would not wait one minute longer because this is going to continue if you don't. He may not have any proof that you punched him, but you don't know if he hit himself and then took photos. I don't trust him one bit.
Just to give you an example of how they are: my xh told his lawyer that I had tied him up (250 lb man and taller than myself) and dumped all of his clothes in the driveway and set them on fire. Now, keep in mind, my driveway is blacktopped. It didn't fly with the lawyers or the detective.
Please file the order or better yet, go to the police station and speak to someone in charge about your complaint. Generally, you'll get more action by going in person.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
More central scripting here - great advice from Snodderly.
My xh also claimed assault and setting fire to his papers. (he is 6 inches taller than me and has amazing reflexes - first class fencer - I wouldn't have stood a chance!!) The setting fire to his papers was when we decided prior to all of this, to get rid of a lot of personal stuff going back 30+ years that we had been dragging around. His idea, joint decision.
He did later, much later, apologise for these claims and said his lawyer put him up to it. But right now your spouse is in another country. Fwiw I think the guilt and shame drives them nuts. Not to mention stupidity
Thank you everyone. B, I am surprised you got an apology. That would be nice to hear one day.
Snodderly - That is what I am concerned about...if he lied further and hurt himself and lied and said I did it. I hope to talk to the attorney within the next hour. I will ask him his opinion on the protective order.
I talk to IA and they said that he put the claim through the courthouse and not the police station. And that he probably will try to tie the two cases together, but there is nothing I can do accept go to court and defend myself.
Bea, did you get charged in your case for the assault? I don't even have so much a traffic ticket and now I am being charged with assault.
I am losing it today...just popped a Xanax to settle my nerves.
Why am I trying to save my marriage again??? This is giving me serious doubts that I should even be trying...
BombOctober 2012- OW 11/28/12 -H still denies Separated 11/29/12 Own place 12/12/12 Confessed OW/EA/PA 2/2/13 Oct 2013 - I knew I was done Jan 2014 - Anticipating the rest of my life
No I didn't get charged, but where I live the police do not usually get involved in minor matters without pretty good grounds - He accused me at the beginning of 2009, just over three years after the alleged assault occurred, and apologised 2 years later, saying it was silly. He used it as part of the grounds for divorce - that I used violence and physical threats against him.
I was pretty upset at the time, even without the threat of court action. It must be awful for you. Hopefully the courts will have some common sense in a world that seems to have gone mad.
Thanks Bea...this is actually a charge. I have to speak with a different attorney as the attorney I have for my civil actions only deals with family law and not municipal matters. I have a good recommendation for an attorney that we use for issues with my employer. Hopefully he can help me get this resolved. Thanks again.
My meds are kicking in...hopefully the Lord helps me out on this one.
BombOctober 2012- OW 11/28/12 -H still denies Separated 11/29/12 Own place 12/12/12 Confessed OW/EA/PA 2/2/13 Oct 2013 - I knew I was done Jan 2014 - Anticipating the rest of my life
B, I am really sorry that your situation has escalated. I'm glad you'll be talking to your attorney. Try not to worry. If I remember correctly, your h came to your home and demanded the tax documents. When you refused to turn them over he should have left, especially since your children were present. His behavior was threatening.
It's really unfortunate that OW is spurring him on. Neither of them is acting rationally. You are wise to only communicate in writing. Choose your words carefully and keep everything.
You will survive this, B. Work toward settling the finances so that you have autonomy. Try not to think about saving your M right now. Continue to make changes that you deem necessary to become your very best. Create a life of peace and harmony for you and the boys. Decide who you want to be and work toward that. With goals in place you won't have the mental space to think about your h.
Lots of M's can rebound even after OP and challenging events. Leave that to the future and focus on you and the boys today.
Thanks GM- The people on this board are great. I love you all!!!
Talk to Family attorney regarding the civil matters in two weeks for custody and support. He feels very confident that I will get close to what I asked for. Even if I don't, I am getting zero from H right now, so something is better than nothing. He also said that these recent "assault" allegations will have no bearing in those civil matters as the judge will see right through that...the fact was I filed the motions of support/custody and now in retaliation he is filing false allegations. My attorney is the best in our area and said.."the judges aren't stupid and will see right through that". So I am confident on that.
I am waiting on the call back from attorney #2 for the assault charges...will follow up.
Thanks again guys. I am regaining some positive after hearing from my first attorney this AM.
Here's to hoping everything works out.
BombOctober 2012- OW 11/28/12 -H still denies Separated 11/29/12 Own place 12/12/12 Confessed OW/EA/PA 2/2/13 Oct 2013 - I knew I was done Jan 2014 - Anticipating the rest of my life
BombOctober 2012- OW 11/28/12 -H still denies Separated 11/29/12 Own place 12/12/12 Confessed OW/EA/PA 2/2/13 Oct 2013 - I knew I was done Jan 2014 - Anticipating the rest of my life
