New to This - An English Man In Trouble

[Hadlee58]

Thanks mr bond, I probably deep down agree with you, I haven't seen that she has read any books or looked for any advice although after my attempt last week to bring up how we move forward which I failed miserably at I have triedto back off to some degree, maybe I am burying my head in the sand, how should I approach this with her with out sounding controlling?
Her needs that she thought I didn't fulfil we're that I could be overpowering and controlling, I didn't appreciate her position within the family and that I had no life of my own and expected the same from her and was jealous when she started to do things on her own, gym, socialising with friends etc.
I have looked at myself with a critical eye and can see my part in her feelings and am actively working on improving all of them
It's funny right now (last week and this week) she has been under massive pressure at work whilst others are off sick (her workload has increased dramatically) I would have previously gone in to overdrive trying my hardest to make her life more bearable however for now I am making more of an effort in just listening and offering help when asked. I do think that right now the last thing she needs is intense relationship discussions (is it a case of there is always never going to be a good time to bite the bullet?)
I do feel slightly disheartened that I see no signs of her looking within herself and putting getting our R back on track, her answer is that it if we just keep doing what we are doing in time things will get better, maybe she is testing me that I have really changed?
Thanks again for your advice