So sorry you've gotten this news! I'm glad it's not affecting you too deeply, it sounds like that like me, you probably just assumed your spouse was in an A even though you didn't have solid proof. So you've probably already dealt with the grief over it.
Originally Posted By: sthelen
I calmly forwarded the email to him, adding no words of my own. Other than that, I haven't told a soul and haven't reacted at all.
Sending it to him with no comment, that was actually a great idea! That will really leave your H wondering what you're thinking. Let him wonder!
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How do I proceed?
You're doing fine, just remain silent on the issue until and unless your H asks to talk about it. If he wants to talk then you just remain silent and let him speak. Just be a good listener. This is HIS mess to sort out, not yours.
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I would still be willing to work on the marriage if he's interested.
I wouldn't tell him that unless he asks you.
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I'm going to call my therapist's office as soon as they open. I'm sure there's some real hurt and emotion under this shock and numbness.
Should I also call my DB coach?
Talk to people about it to get it out of your system, just make sure not to talk to shared friends or family about it. Talk to people who have no connection to your sitch. IC and DB coach are good choices.
