No new medical news with W, she won't get the BRCA results back for a week. Surgery is scheduled for a couple of weeks from now. The BRCA test will determine what surgery she proceeds with.
I thought I had mentioned this before, but scanning my last few posts I don't see it- W went on vacation with OM. She told me she was going to CA with him, I just wished her well. Our relationship really is "friendly neighbors" these days and this news didn't really have any impact on me one way or the other. I did ask her if she had told the kids just so I would know whether to keep it a secret or not. She said she had not told them and didn't plan on telling them. She left last Wednesday and it turns out she did tell the girls before she left.
W got back yesterday and stopped by my house and hung out there quite a while. She said they did a wine-tasting thing which she hated, they also zip-lined (at her request) and she had a lot of fun with that. Interesting that she chose to do that as the kids and I just did it for the first time on our recent vacation in the Ozarks.
Anyway, I had a lot of fun with the kids while she was gone. We ate out a lot, went and saw a couple of cool movies, went shopping and S10 and I went to Legoland. D16 has been pumping iron with me 3 times a week too, it's been a great bonding experience with her
Had a convo with D16 about our sitch. I can't remember how it got started, but D16 started talking about W and OM and then shut down and said she didn't want to talk about it. I told her that I understood it was painful, but that I thought she should try and open up about it because keeping stuff bottled up inside is what W does and it's never served her well. D16 said she was tired of W not telling her what's going on with OM, she said she wanted to know if they were just friends (as W has always claimed) or if it's something more. She said W would never give her a straight answer. I didn't want to tell D that W is lying, so I just told her that I understood her frustration, but maybe W answers that way because she doesn't know the answer herself. D also said that she didn't know why, but it bothered her more that I might start a relationship than if W does it. I assured her that I had no intentions of getting into a serious R anytime soon. I told her that I would be dating, but would keep that to days that I don't have them.
Originally Posted By: stilllookingup
Interesting she texts you to vent. Sorry! not mind-reading but that was my first impression. Good job validating her feelings
I just think of it as the "friendly neighbor" thing, I'm just someone to talk to.
Originally Posted By: BrightFuture
AS, when did you come to this realization that you are not in love with her anymore?
I think it happened slowly over time, there wasn't a sudden epiphany, just the realization at some point that the "in love" feelings were no longer there. Love is a choice and I could choose to love her again, but I wouldn't consider that unless there was some interest from her. I love her as the woman I spent much of my adult life with and as the mother of my kids. But I'm now in the same "ILYBINILWY" boat that she is.
Quote:
Would you still want her back?
Hard to say. Would I be willing to try? Yes, I would do that for my kids. Would it work out? I honestly don't know.
Quote:
Why do you continue DB?
For me and those in my life, to make myself the best person I can be for me and for them
