No, I don't think so. Better job... more pay... leaving a semi-toxic (for you it seems) environment... back to an area you are very familiar with... That seems like a boatload of positives to me.
Am I required to discuss my moving with H first?
Personally, I would. It would only be proper to discuss a major move with your husband. It is going to have an affect on his life in some manner and only seems fair. Ask for his opinion. Ask him how he would feel about it.
When you have the discussion, I would only discuss the the positives (save the parental thing) it would be for you. I might consider all the positives the move would have on BOTH of you (more money, career advancement, better working, etc) and what it might mean to your future, as well. I might tell him that since he works in yet another state that where you are living and working will not affect what he is doing.
If he brings up the D residency requirement thing, I would feign ignorance on the matter with a simple "Gees, that thought never even entered my mind. I was only considering the positives" or something to that effect.
“Things turn out best for the people who make the best out of the way things turn out” ― Art Linkletter
