It's hard trying to not only feel resentful, but to not act resentful or show those emotions as well. It's hard not being in a normal freakin R where you can openly talk about your feelings!!!
I know it is so very hard. I tried, and didnt always get there, to look at it this way. My xh wasnt joyful during that time, he wasnt happy, he wasnt sane. So, I was able to keep my resentment in check with those thoughts (most of the time - LOL), because how could I be resentful of that life he was leading?
I am really struggling with not getting ahead of myself. My mind can't stop thinking of all the various future scenarios. Not productive, I know. Trying to live in the now, but limbo land svcks. I think that's why I perseverate so much on the future.
Limbo land really succks. Big time. No doubt about that. Trust me when I tell you that perseverating doesnt serve you well. It just causes you more anxiety and resentment because you have no idea how this will play out. Trying to figure it out does not help you move forward.
I wonder if they really do see how flawed the OW is, but admitting that would be admitting they are flawed too.
My xh told me when he started to see how flawed she was, that was the beginning of the end of the affair. Your h will see it, T, when he is ready to see it. And the more he is moving closer to you and feeling comfortable, the sooner he will. But, I do remember, when ow was pulling harder, that my xh, for a time, was being pulled closer to her in a last ditch effort to hold on. For the reasons you said - if she is really flawed, what did that say about him? When he realized the flaws were bigger than his need to feel "right" in his choice, he was able to let her go.
I am hoping that he will enjoy spending time with his family on this trip. And for some reason, I think he will
I know he will, T. And you might want to think about saying something about the cell phone use on a family trip. This is your vacation, too.
Wonder if he got the whole not seeing what is right before your eyes message? Probably not! Lol!
Loved that movie! And yea, I'm thinking he didnt get it. But that's not to say a seed wasnt planted.
Texting even while his parents were here.
That's just freakin' rude.
I think this family trip has her wanting to have H on a tight leash AND muzzle!
Oh, trust me, she aint liking it. Succks for her.
Doesn't matter which is true - either way, I consider it running.
Running from himself. That sad part of that is, he cant get away from him.
